And if you think the LOTG are tough to interpret ...

... please read the thought provoking piece by Paul Levy at NRAH, When the rulebook has no remedy.

It is a pale comparison to be sure as in our typical context we discuss the most minute exceptions to what is detailed in the NRAH article, but articulates (a) that not everything can be solved by a "rule book" (or an advanced directive in this case), and (b) There are times that we as humans are pressed into untenable positions where there may be no "right" answer, only a "best" answer.

As humans, and as referees, we have to accept his is a part of life.

Say it with me ...

FC Kansas City player copes with tragic death of husband

Jaime French stood patiently on the sideline, waiting to enter the first professional soccer game of her career. Before the whistle sounded, though, French took a moment to glance across the field and into the stands. ...

See the whole story here, courtesy of The Kansas City Star.

Kicking Back Comments: Sadly, part of life is loss, and Ms. French certainly has endured her share given this story. The Game can certainly bind us, even in the face of such tragedy.

Soccer is Life.

A message from Bruce Hamilton, President of Boston Area Youth Soccer

Please Observe a Moment of Silence this Weekend

In case you weren't aware, Martin Richard, the 8-year old victim of the Boston Marathon bombings was a member of Dorchester Youth Soccer. In response to this senseless violence and the impact it has had on our soccer community, BAYS suggests that a moment of silence occur before every game this weekend in observance and out of respect for Martin and all of the victims of this tragedy.

Sincerely,

Bruce Hamilton, BAYS President

Kicking Back Comments: While I currently do not have teams or players in BAYS, you can bet I will honor this request during my matches this weekend. I invite all others to do the same, regardless of sport, regardless of affiliation, regardless of anything, please take a moment and reflect.

Lightning Strikes 3 Times!

Well friends, you know the old saying that lightning dosen't strike twice in the same spot, well it happened to me three times today! Please let me explain.

By the way, before I really get going, the expression is just a myth as it is fairly common for lighting to strike more than once in the same spot. NASA did a study on it.

So there I was minding my own business at work today, and having, well, a work conversation. The discussion was wrapping up and near the end of it, the person whom I was talking to said "... I like your blog ... ."

I always get a little sheepish when someone says that outside of the "soccer mainstream" as I'm never quite sure what reaction I am going to get as I can be somewhat ... well opinionated.

We spoke for a while actually, and I was truly flattered they took the time to read and enjoy the subject matter and gave me some good advice that I will share below.

Walking back to my office I though that was pretty neat, I'm glad others enjoy reading this stuff, heck that others are actually reading this stuff.

From there I struck up an online conversation with a colleague from the UK who I had not heard from for some time, and always enjoyed his wit regarding technical matters. Near the end of the conversation, lighting struck again and they too mentioned my rants on my blog.

This one I found not only really humbling, but also pretty darn accurate as the classification of a "rant" I think is more in line with what I do here. But again, in the same day, lightning strikes again.

On the way out for the day, I was stopped in the hall by another colleague, who made mention of my refereeing past and association to The Game. I was again blown away, and struck for the 3rd time in the day.

While I stumbled over the question I was asked, my head was racing with thoughts of "oh crap I really have to be careful about what I'm writing if folks are actually reading stuff."

There are days I sit here and ask why would anyone read this stuff ... even I can't stand to read it some days. Today was one of those days that I was truly humbled by the reaction from folks reading Kicking Back.

For those who have read, and those who have responded to me, positive or negative, I thank you, and remain humbled by your viewership.

Now the really good piece of advice I got was when I shared that there are times that I have strongly considered keeping this blog away from any "professional" sites, such as LinkedIn where many have received these updates.

This individual just looked at me and said, "It's who you are ... nothing wrong with that, right?"

And they are right.

For all the warnings that I have tossed out here about acting responsibly in front of cameras and how bad things can happen if it goes horribly wrong, there is another side to that.

It is also an opportunity to share with a far wider audience what makes one tick, and gain perspective about who we are.

Challenging, and a little frightening to be sure. But one with the right amount of tempering (sorry folks still can't go off the deep end here) I am coming around is a very positive thing.

I learned a lot today ... that NASA did a study of lighting events (I already knew it could strike multiple times in the same place) ... and that some appropriate sharing, is not such a bad thing.

It won't stop me from railing about Sepp ... but at least you'll know it comes from the heart =)

Soccer is life

You know it's funny. JAFO came up with this saying some time ago and I continue to be amazed at how true it is. Here is just another great example.

I found this article in The Guardian where after the death of a friend, Andrew Cassidy turns to what, yes football, to help him stay fit.

Oh by the way, he is 50 ... and by the look of the video below, truly talented.

An overnight internet star is born.

... say it with me ... Soccer is life.

Happy Valentines Day

Credit: Tumblr

Check out, 7 Reasons Why We Love Soccer, courtesy of Bleacher Report. An appropriate read on this day honoring Saint Valentine.

Soccer Night in Newtown ... A Great Success

Soccer Night in Newtown helps community heal

NEWTOWN, Conn. -- They came together from every part of the country, a Who's Who of U.S. soccer, to support a town in pain. Soccer Night in Newtown took place here on Monday night, three weeks after the tragic shootings at Sandy Hook Elementary School, and everywhere you looked there were fútbol players engaging the 1,200 kids from this soccer-loving community who filled two 90-minute sessions.

In one corner of a community center, MLS stars Landon Donovan and Kenny Cooper signed autographs and posed for pictures. In another, Mia Hamm dispensed hugs and hellos. A few feet away, Alexi Lalas played a small-sided game and screamed maniacally ("AHHHHHHH!") when one of the children scored a goal. And over at midfield Kristine Lilly and Christie Rampone signed soccer balls for a snaking line of admirers. ...

See the whole story here from SI.com.

Kicking Back Comments: Say it with me. Soccer is Life.

Christmas soccer in Philadelphia, 1912

Christmas soccer in Philadelphia, 1912

Memories of Thanksgiving soccer matches were being replaced with anticipation of more holiday matches in the minds of area soccer fans as Christmas 1912 approached.

Christmas fell on a Wednesday that year and so provided a rare opportunity for a midweek match. The previous weekend had seen some 21 games across three leagues and several different divisions as well as eight exhibition games. Among those exhibition games were teams from the city’s Pennsylvania League and American League, who had no league game scheduled because of the first round of Philadelphia Challenge Cup ties. In cup play, Pennsylvania League champions Tacony were downed 2-1 by current league leaders Victors at Third and Lehigh, their second victory over the Sawmen of the season. Earlier in the year, the Victors had advanced as far as the semifinals of the 1911-1912 American Cup, playing eventual Cup winners the West Hudsons to two draws before losing the third game 1–0 in extra time. ...

See the whole article here, from Philly Soccer.

Kicking Back Comments: This is a great article! I have to say there are times when we forget that soccer in the US has some significant roots too. Also, in poking around this blog, there seems to be some real quality stuff there.

A welcome Christmas present!!

From all of us here at Kicking Back, have a very happy holiday season!

"It's Thanksgiving"

For a backstory on the video, take a look here from the Daily Beast.



Why would I do this to you all?

Two reasons:

1. To wish you all a Happy Thanksgiving first and foremost.
2. The soccer connection is that Nicole's dad Scott is a former professional player for the Tulsa Tornado, Oklahoma City Stampede, and Detroit Express, where he was named Rookie of the Year in 1983 and currently is a coach as Presentation College.

Say it with me ... soccer is life.

... and please don't shoot the messenger.

Lest there be any question ...

So Easter Sunday was, despite the colder weather, good. I watched all of the coverage of Tom Boonen's "2-fer" with his win at  Paris-Roubaix, after his win last week at the Tour de Flanders.

I was able to get out for a ride myself, no where near those speeds of course, but was thinking about the grand tour series that is upon us, and who these cycling athletes have respect for.

In looking around several pro cycling sites, I cam across the Katusha Team (THE Russian Global Cycling Project ... I love that) and took note that in all the riders bio's was the answer to "Who is your favorite soccer team?"

I found that interesting as you generally don't see "Who is your favorite NBA team?" when you see a bio with a NFL player.

Why the overlap? I think because soccer is so universal, that you can ask any (non-american) athlete who their favorite soccer team is and they will have an answer.

Soccer is Life.

By the way, lest there be any question that the Grand Tour season is upon us for cycling ... take a look below. It again looks to be an awesome time in Italy ... and with a start in Denmark.

I have to find a reason to get over there for work =)

Great Story from NRAH

A lesson for a coach

One of my favorite stories in my new book took on surprising relevance recently.  First here's the story:

Ali, aged 14, looked like Li’l Orphan Annie. Short, with a head full of curly red hair and freckles, she was refereeing a game of 12-year-old players. One of the coaches, a large middle-aged man, was persis­tently and angrily yelling from the sidelines about the calls she was making.

She calmly walked over to the coach, looked up at him and said, “Don’t you think you are taking this a bit too seriously?” ...

See the whole story here, from Paul Levy at Not Running A Hospital.

Kicking Back Comments: A great read, and a worthy lesson for us all.

Imagine refereeing there ...

Guantanamo detainees get new $750G soccer field

At a time of record deficits, a new soccer field for detainees at Camp 6 in Guantanamo Bay is just getting the finishing touches -- at a cost of $750,000 to taxpayers.

The project was the highlight of a tour Tuesday of the detention camp for reporters at the facility covering the arraignment in a military court of Majid Khan, a former Baltimore resident and the the only legal U.S. resident on trial at Guantanamo. ...

See the whole story from Fox here.

Kicking Back Comments: Political commentary (genuinely) aside for a moment ... This may one of the purest forms of soccer to be played ... for fun, for sport, for hope. Prison soccer is not to be trifled with, not because of the players, but because, I believe it means, and can provide, much more to inmates than to many who show up on a given Sunday because they feel they have to.

Another good story is Soccer Behind Bars from ABC describing a prison soccer league in South Africa and the very complex relationships the players and league have behind prison walls. The article also references some guy from Africa named Mandela (Nelson Mandela anyone?), and how a prison soccer league transformed the anti-apartheid movement.

One thing that has always struck me when I think about this is it is funny to be that these folks don't need referees at all. They figure it out all on their own. Why can't others that are far more "privileged" in what they have, figure that one out?

I think there is a lesson or two in there somewhere for some of us on the "outside."

These fan(atics) have a special place in his ... heart

Moms who saved soccer referee's life to get awards

The mothers of two Vandebilt Catholic soccer players will receive an award for saving the life of a referee who collapsed in the midst of a January game.

Tommy Manor, a longtime Houma referee and coach, collapsed during the Vandebilt girls Jan. 3 game against Lutcher. He survived, but officials said that was because of the diligent efforts by four moms who had been watching the game from the stands.

Manor spent several days at Terrebonne General Medical Center, and he said he has since made a full recovery. ...

See the whole story here, courtesy of houmatoday.com.

Kicking Back Comments: A truly great story and one that continues to show there is still good in the world.

I have to say though, 5 weeks and he is back! Holy smokes! I'm not so sure I would be so brave, after so short a time. Good for him though ... no doubt doing what he loves.

Testing One's Mettle

The tournament atmosphere is one of the blacksmith's fire. Teams and referees are thrown into a crucible of activity over a very short span of time. Players endure as many as five or six games over a weekend, and referees may end up working twice that many.

Fatigue, injury, equipment failures, decision making under pressure, high stakes. Only the strong survive. It is a battle of attrition.

A Regional level tournament takes all of that to yet another level, as careers (both referees' and players') can be defined. Last week I saw a very solid promising referee get assigned a game just slightly over her head. It was a level of play she had officiated in her home state many times before, but today the skills were sharper, and the stakes were higher. Suddenly she felt stretched, and more than a little overwhelmed.

As I watched the game, I could tell she was out of her comfort zone. She was refereeing by rote - mechanically doing the things she had done many times before, but not really 'feeling' the game. Her good habits were carrying her through this game. She survived, but barely.

Observing her in the dressing room after the game, she was obviously stunned, her confidence shaken. This referee was at a crossroads. Suddenly her dreams of becoming a FIFA referee did not seem so attainable. But with a little support from her crew and quiet discussion with the match assessor, she has decided to keep going. She vows to complete this journey. I for one could not be happier for her.

Everyone gets knocked down from time to time. What matters is what you do next.

Soccer is Life

More than a badge

It can be hard to remember sometimes that the people behind those referee badges have friends, family, jobs, interests, and real life stuff outside of soccer. Believe it or not, there is a real person under these uniforms. JAFO put this quite elegantly in his post "Making Connections."

In my recent past as I try to find some form again after law school (other than spherical), I have had the opportunity to really reflect on what is important, and just how lucky I am for my family and I to have good health.

As part of my regime now I am cycling a bunch, getting ready to do some racing (gulp), but most importantly riding in a series of charity rides to help those who are inflicted by some really horrible diseases. Just as much as I am astounded by how many people are touched by THE game. I am even more astounded in how many are touched by such horrible ailments that cut life short or curtail it significantly.

All too often I cavalierly speak about this play, or that physical act, or fitness of a player or referee, many times forgetting about those who just never get the chance, or those who could at a point in their life, and now can't.

For my part in reflecting on those who may not have this chance, I am raising funds and riding in Ride the Rhode bike tour for MS in about a week. On this tour about 900 cyclists will ride 150 miles to raise funds for MS, a truly horrible and debilitating disease that makes life just that much more challenging.

If you have the time, please come on out and ride, or volunteer your time. It is an experience that you will never forget to help others, who may not be able to help themselves.

If you can't come out, please consider sponsoring me for this ride here. All donations regardless of amount are warmly accepted, are paid directly to the National MS Society, and are tax deductible as allowed by law as a recognized 501(c)(3) charity.

For a full BBB report on the National MS Society, please go here.

Yes, soccer is life, and sometimes life, like soccer, can bounce in a way you never expect. Please help me to make a difference for someone who may have caught and unlucky bounce.

Don't forget ...

Card available at Greeting Card Universe

So I have to be honest here. This particular article gave me a bunch of trouble as it went from the history of Valentine's Day, to if the US will ever love THE game, and how so many in the US, especially the youth already do as it is claimed to be the most popular youth sport in the US.

I scrapped all of this and will save it for another time.

Now it may sound goofy to some, but as the card indicates above, the true testament to affection is loving someone even MORE than soccer. I caught this post on Big Soccer from 2009 stating the authors "first and only love" was the LA Galaxy. While I am sure meant in jest, there was some truth in these somewhere I'll bet.

THE game can be all consuming at times, especially with those (like me at a point in my life) that are so singularly focused working toward a particular goal while ignoring things that are important along the way.

My advice, for what it is worth ... In the vernacular of the day ...

Stop and smell the roses to appreciate all you have, which includes the friends we make through THE game. You only go around once, and while THE game in all her majesty is life changing ... it is only a game. What you choose to do with these life experiences is what really counts.

Happy Valentine's Day!

"The usefulness of uselessness"

I am a reader of Nature Magazine. It is really a fascinating magazine that deals with a whole bunch of heady topics that I like to distract myself with.

The other day I was flipping through the August 25th issue, and noticed an article named, "Quantum mechanics: The usefulness of uselessness", authored by Andreas Winter. An abstract of the article is here:

"A game for three or more players called 'guess your neighbour's input' reveals common ground between classical and quantum physics — at the expense of more exotic, super-quantum, theories of nature." (See Nature 466, 1053-1054 (26 August 2010) | doi:10.1038/4661053a; Published online 25 August 2010)

In pursing the article I ran across the following picture to illustrate what is going on in this super-quantum context, mouth agape. Now, I have used sport analogies often to describe a litany of things. This is the first time I have seen it to describe such a relatively complex topic.

Yet another example of what I am coming to call the "JAFO Paradox": Soccer is life.

With permission from Nature Magazine

Soccer Crop

Photo courtesy White Barn Farm

So over this last year my wife and I have partaken in a community farm (CSA) in Wrentham named White Barn Farm. It is a really cool place, run by some really nice folks who grow organic vegetables of which we purchase a share for the season and have enjoyed fresh veggies now for just about the whole year. For those interested they also have a roadside stand they run that is just out if the world!

Well, these folks put on a farm dinner the other night which was particularly excellent. They paired with Tastings (of Patriot Place fame who supplied their master chef for the evening) as well as Franklin Honey, and Burnshirt Valley Farms, for a tremendous organic and completely farm raised dinner. It was a fantastic event that I hope they do again soon.

We sat with some really nice folks and enjoyed conversation for the evening. One couple we dined with were the owners of Tastings and learned about their fascinating story of how Tastings came to be, and their deep roots in the community.

We also sat with a very nice couple from a Northwest suburb of Boston. Somehow the conversation turned to sports briefly and the gentleman shared his opinion about being an O-35 player, his team, how they were doing, and how much he enjoyed the league and playing. I was taken back in the most positive of ways at just how much he loved the game as he expressed himself. For whatever reason I did not expect to run into such a conversation in that setting.

Later on in the evening, I heard off in the distance someone mutter, "... Manchester United ...", and in the next sentence, "... Chelsea ... ." It was at this point in time despite being engrossed in a conversation I had to stop and listen for just a second to get some context.

A few places down I head one of the farm owners and another restaurant owner and chef discussing the days EPL results and their comments about the play and refereeing. Now I was blown away. Not so much about the topics, but about the passion that these folks were speaking about it. They were *really* into these teams and clearly were knowledgeable fans.

It was another reminder of something that JAFO says often, that Soccer Is Life.

This was yet another affirmation of that truism and a lesson for me of just how amazingly true that is.